Why Do I Bother?

Google Answer to Filling Jobs Is an Algorithm (New York Times)

Google is trying something new with hiring folks these days, and I began to read this article with enthusiasm, thinking a dream just might come true and I could find myself on the payroll next year with my favorite corporation. Alas, I still need to finish school even to be the janitor.

Mathematics is absolutely required for engineering at Google, and it's a subject I have long put away after going nine rounds with Calculus earlier in the decade. I feel comfortable with math but it takes a good bit of time and an inordinate amount of self-discipline to operate at that higher level.

Google has created a survey that its candidates will begin taking this month, and it predicts it might double its workforce this year (which is 10,000) and that means about 200 hires per week. They had to find some quantitative method, didn't they? I probably would, too. With my current level of education and experience I still don't qualify even for systems administration. So...

If given the chance I would propose to Google that they buy me. That's right, me. They can put me through the rest of school and I will work for them to pay it off. If Google gives every employee so much to come and stay, why can't that be education? They're building an army and they seem to have the money to accommodate me (not to mention a little pull with the folks at Stanford), the only question is how do I ask this? Who do I e-mail, or where do I show up to yell "I want to finish school so I can work for Google!"

If I could ask the right person and they can answer me objectively as to why it's not a good idea, I'll quit. But until then, while the United States Army is still offering to pay off student loans to any flunkie who went to college, it's a good idea for Google to front me some education. Hell, I'd even settle for Berkeley. Everyone says they're starving for people, but I just don't see it yet. The Department of Family and Children Services will pay for a Graduate degree while the social worker goes to school while employed, and some school districts will pay for education so long as the future educator signs a contract to teach in that district for a period of time. I believe I have a case.