A couple of days ago I saw a bumper sticker that said "Annoy a Liberal: Live - Succeed - Be Happy." I couldn't agree more. Actually, it's the same thing liberals tend to do. Does that mean we annoy the shit out of ourselves? No. It means that this bumper sticker is incomplete. So I'll let you in on how to really annoy a liberal:
1. Be selfish. "God bless America, and no place else." What? They just blew up a power plant that will ultimately lead to the death of many innocent people? Oh, never mind. It wasn't here, so fuck 'em. I can still turn off the TV, climb into my 2-ton commuter, and stop by Starbucks on the way to work this morning.
2. Succeed by fucking other people out of what they earned. I'm not saying that liberals don't cheat, but when they do, I don't think so many people are affected. I'm not talking about sharing mp3 files and screwing the music industry - that doesn't heavily affect our quality of life. I'm talking about squeezing everything you can out of your customers when selling cars, movie tickets, oil, and even razors. Stop making so much money and keeping it. Oh, and did I mention easy credit?
3. Waste resources. See 2-ton commuter mentioned above.
4. Support any type of war. That speaks for itself. Apparently, war kills people and doesn't really solve anything. It creates more hate. I'm for the death of certain leaders, but not for the death of the innocent people under their rule.
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